EVERYTHING IS PERSONAL. INCLUDING THIS BLOG.
About me, the blogger
Amanda's Authors Note
Who am I?
When asked to describe yourself, it’s usually difficult to articulate your thoughts into words because we associate description with something that is easily spoken or written, but how can we condense our unique experiences and memories into one simple definition? Humans are multifaceted and able to constantly adjust to the different changes in environment that are encountered throughout the various stages of life. During these new experiences, we are bound to explore and experiment with our different identities that we cultivate within ourselves. In other words, when we attempt to reduce and summarize ourselves into a mere description, we are forced to remain surface level and present. This is complicated because our identities are beyond what is felt in the moment. Our identities are a fusion of who we were in the past, who we are in the present, and who we will become in the future. Instead of being asked to describe ourselves, we should be asked “What is the aspect about yourself that you believe will remain as the integral part of your identity?” because this helps us focus on one characteristic about ourselves that we can expand upon in an authentic way.
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In my own case, the aspect of myself that I believe to be the most essential and prominent in terms of shaping my experience of life is my identity as an Asian American. Throughout my 20 years of living, I have been able to slowly learn about what it means to be an Asian American and have established a deep understanding of my own experience as an Asian American. I must admit that I have encountered many complications due to many external factors, such as the environment I grew up with, the cultural concepts I learned throughout my youth, and societal influence. This is reflected more in-depth with my background story that discusses my self-growth journey and personal hardships, which will be addressed in the next section of this page. In a sense, my Asian American “enlightenment” served as a sort of catalyst of my personal flourishment.
My Story
I was born into a low-income refugee family that survived mostly off of government assistance. My grandparents and parents were victims of war trauma and sought refuge in America, but this new country also failed at providing them with the bare necessities. Moving from cramped apartment to cramped apartment, sometimes with pests, sometimes with mold; poverty would be the best definition. I remember growing up happy with what we had. Although my parents were busy making ends meet with their factory jobs, they did their best to support our family. I was also raised and coddled by my maternal grandmother from birth until I was 18 years old and she was 71 years old when she unexpectedly passed away. I was barely 18 years old, but I somehow blamed myself for being unable to provide her with a better living situation. Now, I know it’s not my fault, but rather the capitalism-oriented society we live in.
Now, I am a 20 year old in my third year of college, still adjusting to this new life of adulting without the person I love the most. My grandma was always so devoted to our ethnic and cultural background as Lahus. Lahu people are from the hill tribes that are scattered throughout Asia, mainly from Thailand and Laos. I grew up listening to her tales of her life at her old village somewhere in the rural mountains of Laos, and thought of her past as so distant and foreign. As I became a little older, I started learning that this Lahu village life that I fantasized about was still the reality of many distant Lahu relatives and individuals who are still living in the underdeveloped areas my family came from. My grandma’s passion about our culture motivated me to become more interested in my own Lahu American identity, which led me to develop a deep interest in the Asian American experience as a whole.
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With my newfound interest, I excitedly started my first quarter in college with an Asian American history course. The class served as a turning point of my interest in my Asian American identity. Through this course, I was introduced to a myriad of concepts related to the Asian American experience that I was completely unaware of prior to college. One core concept that stayed with me since then was the Model Minority Myth as I found myself able to apply it to my own life.
The Model Minority Myth
The Model Minority Myth suggests that all Asian Americans are able to achieve academic and occupational success and fails to encapsulate the diverse Asian American experiences while also creating a racial wedge between Asian Americans and other minority communities. In other words, this myth accounts for the ways in which Asian Americans are not seen as racial minorities because of the success they were able to attain through education and occupation. For example, Asian students in the United States are portrayed as and expected to be “nerdy” and good at mathematics, which is considered to be a “good” stereotype. Although outsiders may not understand this from a second-hand perspective, the Model Minority Myth and the many Asian stereotypes it umbrellas, are problematic because they disregard the different Asian American experiences that vary throughout the country. The myth is also used as a way to treat Asian Americans as a scapegoat when White Americans attempt to provide reasoning to erase the struggles of racial minority groups. In short, the Model Minority myth is a concept full of false narratives and toxic stereotypes.
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In my own case, the Model Minority myth serves as a foundation for my perceived failures at being Asian American. To put simply, the myth is the main reason why I felt as if I have failed at being an Asian American. This is due to the many problematic stereotypes that the myth umbrellas, promotes, and enforces, which then leads to flawed perceptions of Asian Americans. I am a victim of naively believing in these incorrect portrayals and allowed myself to form ideations of who I thought I was supposed to be. These stereotypes will be further explored throughout this blog and will be discussed in relation to my own experiences.
My Goals
So, what are my goals for this blog? What are my goals in deconstructing the Model Minority Myth? Well, it’s pretty simple. I hope to establish the ways it fails to encapsulate the genuine and unique experiences of Asian Americans. I also wish that more people would acknowledge the toxic misconceptions that the myth enforces and promotes. The Model Minority Myth also plays hand-in-hand with other Asian American concepts including the tiger mom, stigma of mental health, associated timidness and passiveness, and many many other problematic stereotypes. If Asian American identity was removed from any misconceptions and stereotypes materialized from the Model Minority Myth, the Asian American experience would be free of any constraints and false narratives.
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Self-exploration in terms of identity is essential to understand who you truly are at your core. For a while, it was difficult for me to exactly articulate this feeling into comprehensive thoughts, let alone words. Soon enough, I learned about the Model Minority Myth and was amazed by how much I was able to resonate with it. The Model Minority Myth, in a sense, is how I would describe the fundamentals of my journey of understanding my "Asian-ness". The myth and the stereotypes it conceptualizes are the reason why I have felt “othered” and distanced from my Asian American identity.
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Now, I am aware that being Asian American does not mean I have to be educated, wealthy, not discriminated against, or widely represented. Instead, my identity as an Asian American is unique to my own experiences and life. As always, being Asian American is the aspect about myself that I believe will remain as the most integral part of my identity.